The first week, and I'm already late.

So I'm going to post sometime tomorrow. The first reason is technical difficulties. Every time I try to write the review on my computer, the program crashes. I'm working on it. The second reason is I'm having a difficult time getting screencaps. It should be really easy, except Hulu blocks the shot with their information and ABC blanks the screen. I would have to never pause and get lucky, and I'd rather have quality screenshots. I'll see if I have another solution for that, but if not - well, I guess never pause and get lucky it is.

Okay, I'll see you guys tomorrow.

Miss Piggy Explains Her Breakup with Kermit

As a review blog, I don't necessarily keep up om all the Tweets and promotion, but I came across this article on People.com, Miss Piggy Shares the Real Reason She and Kermit Broke Up and I felt it was a relevant thing to share. The first thing I would like to point out is that the byline actually says Miss Piggy. It's totes legit, y'all.

Actually, I'm very proud of the article. Miss Piggy is one of my role models because I always thought she was a strong female and I wanted to be like her, and this article explains the breakup while staying true to that. You should go check it out.

The Muppets Pilot Presentation Reviewed

So, to kick things off before The Muppets debut on ABC next week, I thought I'd do a warm-up review. It's a little late, but I reviewed the pilot presentation, which is available on YouTube. Anyway, let's get started!

The narrative intro is a little blah. It gets one of those "mms" you give when you appreciate someone's attempt at humor but can't be bothered to even fake a laugh. The intro requests, "Please stop yelling at us." We'll see, ABC - we'll see. You still have an entire series to screw up.

Dang, there are a lot of Muppets! I mean, that just Disney has. Could you imagine if the CTW Muppets could play, too? I already hate this new Muppet Denise because she has the slut eyes. She is up to no good.

Bunson and Honeydew are still hilarious! Honeydew tazing Bunson to get everyone's attention - funny on its own. Honeydew ensuring that this was safe because he's wearing protective gear - we have a show, y'all!

Animal is willing to do tasteful nudity and when Kermit says he'll keep it in mind, Animal agrees to begin Crossfit. That's how you know it's adult and 2015. Then Floyd suggested the format this presentation is inexplicably already filming in. Sidebar, I know Floyd is in the band but I don't know what he does. I really only know Animal, Dr. Teeth, and Janice.

Gonzo makes an easy joke about easy jokes and it's a little too on-the-nose to be fun self-referential humor. Then Elizabeth Banks asks if there will be celebrity guest stars and Kermit asks her if she knows any. Ha! You will not be getting pregnant by the male lead on this sitcom, Elizabeth Banks! I mean, that's Kermit... but my point stands, she plays a type!

Fozzie reveals that Piggy isn't doing the show and Kermit says the network won't pick up the show without her. Miss Piggy is the most important part of the show CONFIRMED! Kermit says he's attracted to pigs, but I still think he traded down with Denise. Gonzo says he likes pigs, too, but I'm confused. Besides his unrequited crush on Piggy in Muppet Babies, he's always had a thing for chickens. Where is Camilla, anyway?

When Kermit and Gonzo show up to the set of Piggy's new movie, she doesn't know who Gonzo is. I actually like that joke. At least she got the G right. Then Miss Piggy makes out with Topher Grace. Way to go, Piggy! Someone traded up! Gonzo makes comments as he watches this go down that suggests Gonzo is a bit of a voyeur. We might be getting a little too adult here, guys. Piggy turns down the show because she's busy doing her own thing.

Fozzie goes to his girlfriend's parents' house, and they're totally speciest. I know the mom was on Roseanne, Malcolm in the Middle, and one episode of Boy Meets World but I can't place her name. I do know the dad is Jere Burns, but after seeing him on Bates Motel, I'm genuinely concerned Fozzie may become a rug.

Kermit's in his car complaining about the 405, and I can testify - the 405 sucks. But I'm trying to figure out who the hell Kermit is talking to. No Piggy, no show, so - were they just coincidentally filming a documentary about the Muppets while this whole show thing was happening? Also, drug reference. Slow your roll, Muppets. It wasn't that long ago I was watching your movies. It was today. Adult has many definitions, is my point.

Meanwhile, Fozzie overhears his girlfriend's serial killer dad say something speciest and Fozzie calls him out on it. Way to go, Fozzie! I'll miss you when you're a rug, but much respect.

So the next day, Kermit has to tell everyone Piggy won't do the show and they're disappointed because they've already started spending money. Okay, say what you will about most of that stuff, but Swedish sushi looks legit. Swedish meatballs are bomb with rice - I'd eat it. Anyway, Kermit is really judgmental of everyone's bad judgment like he hasn't known them for over 40 years. Also, I've seen Muppets Tonight, Muppets In Space, every Disney made-for-TV Muppet movie, and you traded Piggy for Denise - they learned it by watching you. Kermits who make bad life decisions have friends who make bad life decisions.

So Piggy shows up and announces she's doing the show after all, and it is awesome how much she does not know anybody she's worked with in the past 40 years. We have ourselves a show!

And the Statler and Waldorf bit at the end - classic. Never change, you crotchety old geniuses.

Overall, I can see why they picked up the series. The Fozzie meeting his girlfriend's parents subplot was a great way to introduce the real world situation aspect of the new show, and the Muppets are still as funny as ever. I really don't understand what was going on with Gonzo, and they laid the adultiness on a little thick, but it definitely has potential.

So come back next week to see me review the first episode of the actual series! Until then, au revoir.

What Is This Blog?

Welcome to The Muppets Reviewed, the blog where I am going to review the new ABC series, The Muppets. It updates on Thursdays.

"Why Thursdays?" asked nobody. "The show airs on Tuesdays." Yes, it does. But I want people to have a chance to watch the show first. That would be the altruistic answer, but nah - I just need time to assemble proper reviews. And I'm launching this Thursday with a review of the pilot presentation.

"What will you do when The Muppets have reruns?" Um, well, imaginary person, it's The Muppets. I'll reach back in time and review something else. It's the Muppets. There will always be something.

See you Thursday!